The Most Powerful Thing You Can Say To Another Mom
Denise Stirk wrote a truly heartbreaking testimonial. There he relates his personal experience with a complex trigger: “What to say to a mother who has lost a child?” . A series of significant situations makes her reflect. And that’s where she discovers the most powerful thing you can say to another mom.
Here we share some ideas from the Denise case that shook the world. This brave, empathetic and understanding mother who came out of a whirlwind of emotions. Not without first expressing his emotional turmoil in his own heartfelt words.
How to approach the grief of another mother?
In this case, the thoughtful and introspective protagonist of this story narrates a tragic event. Nothing less than the unexpected loss of a 21-month-old daughter by her friend. Without a doubt, an irremediable pain and suffering for those who have experienced motherhood.
She decides to travel to accompany her friend during this difficult moment. There several questions arise in the face of the meeting with the sad mother. How to find the right words to comfort them? How to avoid saying inappropriate things?
Searching for the perfect words, she realized that she couldn’t really relate to pain. Well, with two healthy children at home, I felt that I could not say anything without having experience in it. However, armed with biblical verses and set phrases, she threw herself to his comfort.
And there he found a million unexpected words. Extremely powerful and life-altering. It was that strong mother in the midst of a grieving context who said something that struck a chord in her heart. It was perhaps the simplest sentence that could be uttered.
While describing as her worst nightmare all that she had to live with her little angel, she told him disconsolate and with tears rolling down her cheek: “You are a mother .” Prayer that took her breath away and demonstrated the magnitude of her loss and the level of her grief.
The secret to dealing with the grief of another mother was found in her simplest and most significant bond: motherhood. Because while not everyone experiences the suffering of the loss of a child, they did share the joy of having one.
Understand that mother who has lost her child
That was the starting point that helped Denise understand the hell that other mom was going through. Certainly, losing a child is every mother’s fear. The simplicity and forcefulness of that great truth connected her with other mothers.
And here it does not matter how we choose how to educate and raise our children. There is something in common: hearts directly connected to children. That also linked her to her mother, recently diagnosed with breast cancer.
In the waiting room for her treatment, Denise observed the mother of a three-year-old boy. He proudly wore his colorful Superman cape and hospital mask. The mother, cradling him in her arms, whispered something to him. He felt his blood freeze, his heart stop. He suffered for that other mom.
With a sea of tears streaming down her eyes, she remembered her friend’s phrase: “You are a mother . ” Something that also came to mind later, when a restaurant employee struggled to find a babysitter. He found her distraught and furious. Another blow to the heart in this chain of incidental, if not causal, events.
Finally, she appreciated how a mother traveled on her feet for four and a half hours. She looked at the clock impatiently, kissed her baby’s bald head. Everything is to avoid crying and comfort the child. He found her exhausted and frustrated, and he knew it simply because she is a mother.
“You are a mother”, the most powerful thing for another mother
Motherhood is a thread that unites us all. Off-road mothers, rich or poor; with sick or healthy children. Those who breastfeed or give formula milk. All united by the same feeling: a crazy love that paralyzes the heart.
And this last truth can hurt. That is why melancholic advertisements easily trigger mothers to cry. For this reason they cry after leaving their children on the first day of school. Well, every disease, no matter how minor, is terrifying.
For this reason, their hearts ache in the face of perinatal grief or infertility. That is why the idea of a child leaving the nest is terrifying. And it is for this very reason that the death of another mother’s child can be heartbreaking. Thus, we will naturally want to comfort mothers who are facing a difficult time.
It’s just about embracing them and not struggling to get the right or right words. Because, without a doubt, the most powerful thing you can say to another mother is: “I understand you, I am also a mother . “
