Public Tantrums: 9 Keys To Knowing How To Act
Surely it has happened to more than one of us at some time going shopping or walking with our children and that, because of something they wanted and have not achieved, they have had big tantrums in public.
Yes, this usually happens with children and it is something normal and part of their development. The little ones grow up and emotions are something new for them; as they do not know how to express them in another way, they appear in the form of a tantrum. But what am I going to tell you, right? Nothing that you yourself have not experienced.
Our attitude as parents is very important in the face of tantrums in public
This is a situation that tends to occur frequently, especially if our child is between 2 and 4 years old. Children, when they have a conflict, express it with a tantrum: they throw themselves on the ground, scream, cry, kick, etc. Many times they get beside themselves and we are not able to make them see reason or console them.
This is totally normal and we should not worry, but it is clear that it is an uncomfortable situation and that, on many occasions, it makes us lose patience. This is precisely what we cannot get to: we must never lose patience.
They are children and their way of expressing what they feel is through tantrums, because some of these little ones don’t even know how to speak, which causes them greater frustration.
Our attitude as parents
When these tantrums appear in public, parents have to show ourselves close to them and make them see that we understand them. Always bear in mind that the important thing is not the child’s tantrum, but how he responds to it. What do we mean by this?
Every time the tantrum occurs, we have the opportunity to teach our child to deal with those feelings that he is experiencing. If we just get angry and scold you for crying or yelling, we are not directing those emotions, nor are we teaching you tools and resources so that the next times you feel that frustration you can apply them. This is what is really important and what we have to teach them.
9 keys to knowing how to act before tantrums in public
When the tantrum in public occurs when the little one wants something and we are not willing to give it to him, surely what happens will be that he has an aggressive reaction, and that is when we should not act in the same way.
At that moment, if we get angry and shout like them, we will be teaching them that this is the way to solve things, because we are their mirror. These keys will help us to get control of the situation and, in addition, to improve the problem in the long run.
We will keep calm
With children it is always important to react calmly, but in the event of a tantrum it is even more so, so we will try not to get upset despite our child crying, screaming or kicking in a public place.
We’ll act like nothing happened
Tantrums are nothing more than calls for attention and the child uses this resource to get what he wants, even if he is not aware of this intention. For this reason, it is imperative that we ignore this attitude ; that is a suitable strategy to avoid blackmail.
As far as possible, and as long as it is safe, we will leave it alone
It is clear that this advice we can do if the child is in a safe place, if not, we can not do it. In addition, we, even if we leave him alone, will be watching without him noticing. Tantrums are like a play and, if there is no audience (parents), they have no purpose. When the little one realizes that his parents are not there to get his attention, he will calm down.
We will take you to a quieter place
When we are on the street and he has a tantrum, it is best to take him to a quieter place so that he can calm down. Sometimes, moving the child around helps him calm down or forget the reason for his anger.
We will stand firm against tantrums in public
We must not give in to their requests, no matter how tired we are of their tantrum because, if we do, we will be reaffirming that their strategy has worked.
We will let you know that tantrums are not going to do you any good.
If, despite being left alone, the little one continues to have the tantrum, we will tell him that we will not talk to him until he calms down. After this, we will continue to ignore your tantrum until it stops. We will not push you or give you the attention you seek.
We will listen to him, but only when he’s calm
If our child already knows how to speak, when the tantrum passes we will talk with him so that he can explain to us what has been the reason for his anger. In this way, you will understand that you can express your anger and frustration in words. Not giving in does not mean that we do not listen to you or explain how you should act; this we must do.
We will not give much importance to what has happened
When the little one calms down and can be reasoned with, we have to encourage him to ask for forgiveness and explain that with that aggressive attitude he will not achieve anything. This is the way to end the tantrums, so that the child understands that, no matter how much he kicks, he is not going to get away with it.
We will accept your regret
When the little one repents and is willing to ask for forgiveness, we will forgive him, we will support him and we will forget the bad time we have had.
As for tantrums in public …
As we have seen, tantrums in public can occur more frequently than parents would like, but if we follow these tips, we can solve the complicated moment of the tantrum and, in addition, also achieve it in the long term.
One important thing to keep in mind is that prevention is an essential tool and prevents tantrums from happening. How? Establishing limits before leaving the house or doing any activity. If we go shopping, before leaving we will make it clear what we are going to buy and that we are not going to leave there. Above all, remember that patience and love always work.
