The Challenges And Difficulties Of Raising With Attachment To Children
Attachment parenting is a term that, while nothing new, has become fashionable in recent years. The fact is that if as parents we consciously decide to raise our children with attachment, we will have to face numerous criticisms and questions.
This occurs because in Western societies like ours , productivity and independence are favored and glorified, and putting these concepts into practice conflicts with the natural (and normal) demands of a baby.
Difficulties in parenting with children
Thus, in a competitive society where possessions and appearances are given more importance than happiness, when a mother makes the effort to nurture her child, she also has to face numerous difficulties. Here are some of them:
Rigid hospital protocols
Research your hospital protocols and the support they offer to breastfeeding; you can kindly ask that your baby be delivered immediately at birth, that he / she sleeps in the same room, and that milk formulas not be given without your permission. Above all, don’t let them decide for you.
Short maternity leave
Many times we have to make the decision to stop working at least for a time to take care of our children. Other times, instead, we must continue working in order to live. However, there are many impediments that exist and that do not allow us to reconcile our personal and professional life as we would like.
Leaving our child in the care of someone is, of course, not the easiest of decisions, but sometimes there is no option; So, first of all, keep in mind that your baby will also notice the separation, so you should give him all your love when you return from work to make up for your absence.
Loss of confidence in your own abilities
After repeatedly hearing that your milk is not enough, that you hold your child in your arms too much and cry for spoiled, that if you keep letting him sleep with you he will be a dependent adult and other outside opinions about the care of your child, it is to be expected that lose confidence in yourself and your decisions.
But think about it: is it that humanity suddenly cannot survive without milk formulas, bottles, pacifiers, pushchairs and any other system that pretends to replace the mother’s body? In case of difficulties, inform yourself well, investigate and seek help if you consider it necessary . Once again follow your instincts as a mother, you are the best solution to your baby’s discomforts.
Your own doubts and insecurity
Even when you listen to your motherly instincts and maintain your self-confidence, doubts will appear. After all, being a mother is not easy. This is a huge responsibility, so it is normal that you ever wonder if you are doing it right. It is those doubts that will allow you to evaluate yourself and try to improve in certain aspects.
Constant social disapproval of your parenting
Many times and perhaps with the best of intentions, family and friends saturate the new mother with advice and recommendations, thus lowering her self-confidence. A mother busy listening to everyone around her cannot focus on getting to know her baby and learning to decipher his signals.
Although for most people you are raising weak children, in reality, parenting with attachment will generate in your child the emotional security necessary to be an independent adult with good self-esteem.
Your childhood wounds
Related to the way you were brought up, it is the most difficult of all difficulties. Becoming a mother gives you a unique opportunity to discover yourself, to explore your child soul again. Heal your wounds, forgive and continue. By raising your child on the value of respect and understanding, you give your inner child permission to be accepted, respected, and understood.
Do not forget that being a parent is a daily learning and that we all make mistakes. To breed with attachment is to breed with love, and nothing that is done with love and from it is wrong.
